I like to meditate. OK, Some times, I hate to go do it and have to remind myself of its benefits before I can go sit on my cushion with a joyous heart. I try to not push myself or get overly enthusiastic about meditating. I have found that if I go at something as if I was shot out of a canon I will fall like a lead ball before very long. So I am taking the slow and steady approach to my meditation practice. A few minutes a day, every day, I can’t say that I have never skipped a day either, I have. In fact during the height of a recent illness I am sure I missed at least one day, but I do not have a good recollection of those two weeks so I can’t be sure.
Meditating gets me outside of myself. For a few minutes to universe stops rotating around my own head. I feel an ‘at oneness’ with the Pleroma. I let go of the ‘me-ness’ (if that is a word) and grow in love and understanding for my fellow beings. I try to carry this with me throughout my day. I am usually only partially successful. I find that when I drive to work the people that don’t understand the definition of ‘merging’ don’t bother me as much. I am less apt to be phased by a late or lax co-worker than I was ten years ago…two years ago. In the past things other people did would greatly effect ‘me’. ‘How dare that lady cut me off on the freeway’ or ‘the nerve of him to say that to me’ and on and on and on.
I made mountains not out of molehills but out of a grain of sand. I would tell my woes to anyone and everyone that would listen. In fact I would do it again and again and again. Now when I see people turning the little slide shows of their lives into an epic movie with themselves as the producer, director and star I smile. Not to laugh at them, I know that they really believe that the melodrama in their life is all that, no but because I can see my old self in them. Some times I still do this.
Meditation has become for me in many ways it is like seeing the light at the end of the tunnel and knowing that is really isn’t a train. Hope grows, peace abides. I am centered but no longer the center of the universe rather I am just one more speck of star dust shinning for a microsecond in the course of events that make up the All that arose from the No-thing. The more time I spend on the Path that leads to Liberation. The Way of the Gnosis of the heart, the more I love, the more I learn, the less i am an I and the more I just 'am'.
May the Peace which passeth all Understanding be with you.
Amen+
